newcreation

It is 10:06 AM Wednesday morning in the flow of exist

ence. I got up this morning around 6:30 AM. When I got up I made a pot of coffee and let Rudy outside to do his thing. It is a warm hazy morning today. It is suppose to rain this evening. The snow is slowly disappearing. The earth is still brown, but soon there will be flowers.

I took Rudy to get groomed this morning around 8 o’clock AM and then I drove over to Grand Rapids to the Eerdman’s Bookstore to picked up the book “Predestination: The American Career Of A Contentious Doctrine” by Peter J. Thuesen. I was at the Bookstore around 8:50 AM and while there I also bought these books for my library.

“1 & 2 Peter” by Douglas Harink [Brazos Theological Commentary On The Bible]

“God the Peacemaker: How atonement brings shalom” by Graham A. Cole [New Studies In Biblical Theology]

“The Deliverance Of God: An Apocalyptic Rereading of Justification in Paul” by Douglas A. Campbell

“Unlocking Romans: Resurrection And The Justification Of God” by J. R. Daniel Kirk

“The Letter To The Hebrews” by Peter T. O’Brien [The Pillar New Testament Commentary]

I bought the above books and came straight home, because I feel freaked today. I need to stay home from now on. Also I got to pick up Rudy at Noon at the groomer’s. I hate leaving Rudy at the groomer’s all afternoon since he rather be home.

Carol has not called today from New Mexico. Next week Josiah and Bethany will be on Spring break.

So here I sit waking up to another day of existence. I have no plans for the day. I will take Rudy for a walk someplace this evening. This morning before taking Rudy to the groomer’s I walked him around our neighborhood. It amazes me Americans keep going when our whole economy is ready to totally collapse. Our whole way of life in America is running on empty. How long can America keep running when there is no money? America is bankrupt. Scary to think what is going to happen when there will be no money to pay policemen. I keep telling Carol we need to buy guns to protect ourselves from the millions of people someday who will be attacking our home wanting our food and shelter. Carol and I are both hoping the Lord Jesus will come soon.

Last night I watched television and went to bed early. I read before falling asleep last night a book titled “Growing Up Absurd” by Paul Goodman. I also read last night the holy Bible. I am reading through the Revelation of Jesus Christ the last writing of the New Covenant.

Well I will close to wait for the world to go up in smoke.

“9: And when he had opened the fifth seal, I saw under the altar the souls of them that were slain for the word of God, and for the testimony which they held:
10: And they cried with a loud voice, saying, How long, O Lord, holy and true, dost thou not judge and avenge our blood on them that dwell on the earth?
11: And white robes were given unto every one of them; and it was said unto them, that they should rest yet for a little season, until their fellowservants also and their brethren, that should be killed as they were, should be fulfilled.
12: And I beheld when he had opened the sixth seal, and, lo, there was a great earthquake; and the sun became black as sackcloth of hair, and the moon became as blood;
13: And the stars of heaven fell unto the earth, even as a fig tree casteth her untimely figs, when she is shaken of a mighty wind.
14: And the heaven departed as a scroll when it is rolled together; and every mountain and island were moved out of their places.
15: And the kings of the earth, and the great men, and the rich men, and the chief captains, and the mighty men, and every bondman, and every free man, hid themselves in the dens and in the rocks of the mountains;
16: And said to the mountains and rocks, Fall on us, and hide us from the face of him that sitteth on the throne, and from the wrath of the Lamb:
17: For the great day of his wrath is come; and who shall be able to stand?” Rev. 6:9-17

music: Wild Beasts “Two Dancers”

It is 3:21 PM Wednesday afternoon. I am waiting for the daily local newspaper to appear on our drive way. I do not read our local newspapers. My dear wife loves reading newspapers. I love reading the holy Scriptures.

Carol called me this afternoon from Gallup, New Mexico. She is out West for two weeks visiting our children Joe and Beth.

I am sitting here listening to music and waiting for Time to disappear.

I am having a private party this afternoon. I am also reading Revelation of Jesus Christ, the last book of the Bible. I hope to start reading this month the Book of Genesis.

Well I will close to take my daily hot shower. There is usually nothing on television worth watching on Wednesday nights. I will read these books this evening and go to bed the usual time—

“Under The Sign Of Saturn” essays by Susan Sontag

“Growing Up Absurd” by Paul Goodman

“From Resurrection To New Creation” A First Journey in Christian Theology” by Michael W. Pahl

“Life in the Spirit” Spiritual Formation in Theological Perspective” edited by Greenman & Kalantzis

Well I will close for the day.

music: Eat Skull “Wild And Inside”

<a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/20831498@N03/4401192899/” title=”Jonny by keenjonny, on Flickr”><img src=”http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2570/4401192899_fbef945b72.jpg” width=”500″ height=”375″ alt=”Jonny” /></a>

“1: From whence come wars and fightings among you? come they not hence, even of your lusts that war in your members?
2: Ye lust, and have not: ye kill, and desire to have, and cannot obtain: ye fight and war, yet ye have not, because ye ask not.
3: Ye ask, and receive not, because ye ask amiss, that ye may consume it upon your lusts.
4: Ye adulterers and adulteresses, know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God? whosoever therefore will be a friend of the world is the enemy of God.
5: Do ye think that the scripture saith in vain, The spirit that dwelleth in us lusteth to envy?
6: But he giveth more grace. Wherefore he saith, God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble.
7: Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.
8: Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded.
9: Be afflicted, and mourn, and weep: let your laughter be turned to mourning, and your joy to heaviness.
10: Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and he shall lift you up.
11: Speak not evil one of another, brethren. He that speaketh evil of his brother, and judgeth his brother, speaketh evil of the law, and judgeth the law: but if thou judge the law, thou art not a doer of the law, but a judge.
12: There is one lawgiver, who is able to save and to destroy: who art thou that judgest another?
13: Go to now, ye that say, To day or to morrow we will go into such a city, and continue there a year, and buy and sell, and get gain:
14: Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away.
15: For that ye ought to say, If the Lord will, we shall live, and do this, or that.
16: But now ye rejoice in your boastings: all such rejoicing is evil.
17: Therefore to him that knoweth to do good, and doeth it not, to him it is sin.” James 4:1-17

It is 9:09 PM Thursday night in the flow of existence. Carol went to work around 7:55 PM. I went to a Party Store and then to the Full Circle music shop to pick up a CD order. I then came home to wait till it is time to go bed. Existence keeps flowing by.

I am listening to the new Blockhead CD “The Music Scene”.

Today after walking Rudy downtown I spent the day writing and reading from these books—

“A Collection of Essays” by George Orwell

“The World In The Evening” a novel by Christopher Isherwood

Tomorrow is a Friday in the flow of existence. It is suppose to be another sunny day tomorrow, but still cold.

It was a blessing to see the sun shine today. I told my wife even though the sun shone today I still have in me  black shadows. I do not want my wife to believe I find my life a piece of cake.

In the mail today I received the new Xiu Xiu CD “Dear God, I Hate Myself.”

I should go to bed and read the Bible. Usually on Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays I try to read books that feed my soul and not my intellect. Well I try to read spiritual books.

I am weary right now and should just relax both mind and spirit.

Carol will be home late tomorrow morning from work, because she is going out for breakfast with a gang of girlfriends.

Well I will close to wait for sleep state to come.

music: Blockhead “The Music Scene”

It is going on 3 o’clock PM Thursday afternoon. I ate lunch and I wonder what should I get into next? I got out to look at my Sylvia Plath collection this afternoon. I have collected the last couple of years these books by Sylvia Plath or about her—

“The Bell Jar” a novel by Sylvia Plath

“The Journals of Sylvia Plath” Editors Ted Hughes & Frances McCullough

“The Collected Poems” by Sylvia Plath edited by Ted Hughes

“Letters Home by Sylvia Plath Correspondence 150-1963 Selected and Edited With Commentary by Aurelia Schober Plath

“Sylvia Plath: Method and Madness” by Edward Butscher

“Bitter Fame: A Life Of Sylvia Plath” by Anne Stevenson

So much to read and so little time! I should get back into the books I have been reading lately. I seem right now to be into reading and meditating on the Gospel of John. I have been blessed reading these books lately—

“John” [The NIV Application Commentary] by Gary M. Burge

“Father, Son and Spirit: The Trinity and John’s Gospel” by Andreas J. Kostenberger & Scott R. Swain

“The Art of Reading Scripture” Edited by Ellen F. Davis & Richard B. Hays

Yesterday I received in the mail a new book to read titled “Worshiping With The Church Fathers” by Christopher A. Hall. I got this book because it mostly deals with what the Church Fathers wrote on Prayer. I believe the Christian life is a life of unceasing prayer.

“Pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” 1 Thess. 5:17,18

When I got back from having coffee with my friend John I got out a book that he used in seminary on Epistemology titled “Paul’s Way Of Knowing: Story, Experience, And The Spirit” by Ian W. Scott. (I should have mentioned a book that is in my library titled “Epistemology: Becoming Intellectually Virtuous” by W. Jay Wood. I gave this book a long time to our first born son to read. I wonder if he read it?)

Well here I sit at 3:14 PM with books all around me. It has been cold in my cell lately. I find myself feeling strange as we come to the end of another year. We need to shed tears of sorrow for all that we have not done this year. I am always telling my wife I am sorry for not being all I should be as a husband and father. What can I do but pray and strive to be more godly.

Well I will close to put my books away and locate my brain.

music: John Frusciante “The Will To Death”

her kisses were so sweet

her kisses were so sweet
where has the time gone?[ edit | delete ]
posted 11/06/04 (edited Saturday, Nov 06, 2004 11:59)

It is Saturday morning 9:46 AM my day OFF from the Hamilton Farm Bureau-Egg Division. I have been working at the Egg Divison for 573 weeks thus far. When we moved to Holland 13 and half years ago for the first two years I stayed home and took care of the home. Before moving to Holland we lived in Houston Texas. We moved to Houston Texas after I graduated from Reformed Theological Seminary Jackson Miss. We went to Reformed Theological Seminary after I graduated from Reformed Bible College Grand Rapids Mich. I went to Reformed Bible College after leaving Richmond Calif. to train myself to be a soul doctor. I moved to Richmond Calif. after my mother was killed in car wreck in Los Angeles Calif. My mother and sibbings lived in Los Angeles Calif after our step-father Tom moved us there from Norfolk Virginia. My mother met Tom in a bar in Norfolk Virginia-he was a sailor. When my mother met Tom I was living in a small coastal town in Oregon with my uncle and aunt who were drunks and full of violence. After my mother married Tom we (Mike and me) went to live with Tom, mom and Robin in Virginia. My mother was pregnant with my sister Dawnelle (she was three years old when our mother was destroyed in a car wreck December 21, 1968-she was killed by an ambulance-my mother did not see the ambulance and she was taken into eternity by the hand of God immediately-when we die we are either in hell or heaven forever and ever-there are no second chances once we die.
I was born in Oakland Calif in 1952 I never my father. When I was a boy we lived in California, Washington D.C. and Maryland. My mother had Mike who also had no father-she married Earl and my brother Robert was born and my sister Robin came into the sin cursed world. Earl divorced my mother back in the early 60’s-they were not married long-I do not think my mother was ever married to one man very long-maybe the marriages lasted four to five years at the most-I never knew my mother. My mother was a party girl with false teeth and bleached blonde hair.
When my mother was taken off to face her Judge Mike and I went to live again with my alcohic aunt and her three messed up sons in a small house filled with the fumes of cigarettes and dead dreams. I left and by divine providence lived with Marie and Kim-I was in the 11th grade and became a free spirit-got into bohemianism. Maria threw me up and I lived with another boheminian type family-I was in the 12th grade-I was into Debbie, LSD (lysergic acid diethylamide) and the ant-war movement-I applied for conscientious objector status. America pulled out of Vietnam and God saved me the summer of 1970. After High School I went to Contra Costa Jr. College and then the following year Machinac Liberat Arts College on Mackinac Island-I did not finish the year at Mackinac because the school got into financial problems and was going shut down. I found out about the college closing during winter break-I was living in a Christian commune in Northern Calif. up in the redwoods with a couple hundred Jesus Freaks.
To give you an idea where I was at at this point in my spiritual journey I should tell you I did not immediately go to the Christian commune during the winter break (what year was that?) I got a ride up north from my foster brother Tom-he was going up north to help his hippie sister build a house out in the woods-when we got to her place I bought a huge block of pure hashish (hashish-a resinous product of the top leaves and tender parts of hemp, smoked or chewed for its narcotic effects) and stayed stoned for a couple of weeks. I smoked hashish every day and read the writings of Albert Camus ‘The Myth of Sisphus’-after the hashish was all smoked up I hitched hiked to the Christian commune-I was so out of it that I forgot my boots and had to wear rubber boots when I lived with the Jesus People-when I was a young man I hardly wore shoes-I wore flip-flops.
Back in the early days of being a follower of Jesus I was mixed up-well I was not controlled totally by the Holy Spirit. I was fleshly-my lusts still had strong hold on me-I was a baby Christian who had a lot to learn (Hebrews 12:3-11)
I left the Christian commune and went to live once again in Richmond Calif. I think I had been a Christian by that time three years. I was into speaking in tongues and sex. I worked for a few months in a steel plant. The plant closed down and I was lead by God to join the staff of the Richmond Rescue Mission. I was in love with an older woman and sleeping with her on weekends. I smoked dope and read the English Puritans. Tykie moved away and I met Sandy. Lived a life of a Don Juan and smoked weed. I went to the Orthodox Presbyterian Church in Berkelely Calif. Sunk deeper and deeper in the mire of sin-at times I wanted God to killed me or end my life since I was having such a good time being stoned and having sex all the time. I was under the conviction of sin and I knew if I was to die I would go to hell and burn forever and ever in the Lake of Fire.
One day I was reading the book ‘The New Birth’ by J.C. Ryle and I bowed my head and prayed for God to break the chains of sin-set me free from my life of wickedness. When I finished praying I felt free from sin and decided to leave California and educated myself to be a gospel preacher. Not to long after being made right with God by the blood of Jesus I packed my old car drove to Michigan to finish college at Reformed Bible College. I lived at Mel Trotter’s Mission working as a Night Supervisor till I married Carol May 1979. Now it is November 6, 2004 I am 52 years old and I have been on the narrow way going on 36 years-even when I have not been faithful, God has been faithful.
summary
1970 God saved me
1971 Contra Costa College San Pablo Calif.
1972 Mackinac Island College (on our honeymoon Carol and I went to Mackinac Island)
1973 Richmond Rescue Mission/Tykie
1974 living at the mission and living the life of a hypocrite
1975 became a Calvinist while working at the mission-got into reading the writings of the 17th cent. English Puritans
1976 left the Mission due to having adulterous relationship
“following the way of Balaam” (sometime around here Tykie moved to Oregon)
1977 Sandy divorced with two small boys (we were lovers-smoked a ton of dope and realized our relationship had to come to an end)
1978 left Calif.
1979 married Carol
1981 Caleb Jon born/graduated from Reformed Bible Colege
1982 Josiah was born/moved to Jackson Miss. to attend Reformed Theological Seminary
1983
1984 Bethany was born in Jackson Miss.
1985
1986 left Jackson Miss. for Houston Texas
1987
1988
1989
1990
1991 moved to Holland Mich. to settle down-get jobs and raise our kids-live the simple life of seeking the face of God-July 1991
1992
1993 Nov. I think I started working at the Hamilton Farm Bureau part-time-I worked part-time for two years? I get lost in Time so I am not sure with the dates-If Carol was up I could ask her exactly when we moved here and when I started working at Hamilton Farm Bureau-Egg Division
1994
1995
1996
1997
1998
1999
2000
2001
2002
2003
2004 November 6, 2004 taking to myself time is 11:08 AM my day off from work-my sabbath rest-I will close to sit and ponder the passing of the years.

music: Richard Buckner “Dents And Shells”

2:11 p.m. - 2006-04-27